Pet Peeves #2 - (Originally posted 5/26/08)

Lawd, I hate RUDE BITCHES.
1. I swear, if people don't stop talking on the phone while they're on the checkout line I'm going to go postal. Even worse, this is on the self-checkout line! First off, if you have 2 weeks worth of groceries you should not be allowed to use self-checkout for the love of Gawd! Take you muffin-ass to a regular line where you can get assistance from a cashier, especially if you want to talk to your BFF about bullshit on your cell phone the whole time! The lady in front of me on Sunday is buying for an army, and she had to stop to talk to her buddy about useless crap in between every scan. Are we kidding? She shot me a strange look when I loudly cleard my throat and gave her the "move your freakin' ASS" hand motion. She had someone with her, but the dude may as well have been a doorstop because he served NO PURPOSE. He wasn't packing, he wasn't bagging, why didn't she put HIM on the phone? He was taking up space at the end of the belt looking like he lost his poodle. Then she couldn't figure out the produce situation. Then she had coupons. Mind you, she never thought to tell the person she was yakking with that she'd call her back - that would have been too much like right. I finally decided to get on another (long-ass) self-checkout line since this bitch was NEVER going to get done and would never get how inconsiderate she was being. I wanted to take that cell phone and shove it up her ass!

2. Speaking of cell phones, one thing I'm witnessing a lot lately is people showing up somewhere and do not have the decency to end their call when they arrive. Do us all a favor, would ya? STAY IN YOUR CAR until you finish your call, or, when you walk up to the door of the people you're visiting, END THE CALL. God forbid should people be polite and be able to address and greet the people they're going to see; no, they'd rather keep on yakking, as if they're the friggin' President and the people they're going to see aren't worthy of being greeted appropriately. My mom was grousing to me about this. She was expecting a friend over for a BBQ this weekend. Said friend ambled out of her car carrying a bunch of shit while talking on her cell phone. My mom held the door open for her and not only did this woman NOT hang up, she STOOD IN THE OPEN DOOR without addressing my mom's presence, yakking away as if my mom is made of money and can allow her energy to flow out the door. The woman finally gets in the door - she still hasn't hung up, and didn't hang up for another 5 minutes, and then she's like, "oh hi". THAT WAS FUCKING RUDE. My mom said next time that heffa is on the phone while approaching the door, she is going to slam it in her face. I think that's a great idea.

3. People who rush past you - practically knocking you aside - to get into the bathroom. If I'm already rushing towards the door, it's pretty apparent I have to get there, too. I'm sorry, unless you're signing my check, I really don't give a rat's ass how badly you have to go. Now, of course, if you're holding back vomit or fecal matter is about to explode out of your pants, then by all means, go ahead, but at least say something if your problem is not obvious (like-the-hand-over-the-mouth-I'm-about-to-yak-my-guts-up gesture) so I don't take you for a dick and body check you. Your private parts do not have some sort of seniority and if you take the last stall, be aware I'll be very pissed - and you are very vulnerable :)

4. Service with a Smirk. You know what I'm talking about - cranky, loud, idiot store clerks. Sorry that you hate your job. But having a job, any job especially now, is a good thing, so don't mess with people and piss them off. Even at minimum wage, you are expected to be courteous and professional. I don't want to hear you curse loudly. I don't care about your date last night. And, if I politely ask you a legitimate question about something the last thing you need to do is act like I'm some sort of retard, wasting your time (newsflash - that's what you're there for, numbnuts) and/or roll your eyes at me and give me the "WHAT" look. Here's what - I can ask the manager the same question and then ask why did they hire somebody like you. I don't like getting people in trouble, but dammit, if you're going to be a douche then fuck you and your $5.25 an hour. You'll miss it when you're not getting it anymore, trust me. If you can't control your superiority complex or you haven't digested the concept of customer service, then get a job doing something where no one has to deal with your shitty attitude *cough cough CVSWalgreensRiteAid cough cough*.

5. People, you have GOT to use the BCC field when sending emails! When you're sending emails to a bunch of people DO NOT use the CC field because everyone can see everyone's email address and that's how spam and viruses get around. Also, when you forward emails, take two seconds to highlight and delete and email addresses that may have been left over from the previous sender. If you cared enough to send the email, you should care enough to protect the people you're sending your stuff to!!